David and Goliath, 2009

Now, the Valley of Elah, where David slew Goliath was right smack dab on the way Gaza, at Shochoh, back when it was known primarily for Philistines, idolatry and severing limbs. The brutal Philistines lined one mountain, and the Armies of King Saul the other with a valley in between. (I Sam 17). The Philistines great hope was in Goliath, the Anakim, (a race of Giants), and Dagon, their fish god. On the side of Israel, David, the Son of Jesse was still a very young man, but he had nonetheless already killed a lion, and tended sheep, and the King back then, Saul, was willing to give him armor to fight the deadly giant, but David, overly encumbered by the heavy mail suit, left it all for the great and good armor of Faith in his Redeemer. That and five smooth stones, though he would only need one. All of Israel's army had already tried to take Gaza, the land of the Philistines, which had since the beginning of time troubled Israel and everyone else by making the easiest passage from Egypt to Israel and trade routes therein impossible. Still, on that day, with the bravest of Israeli soldiers unwilling to confront the 9 foot anakim with 6 digits on each limb, a young shepherd of ruddy complexion and a sling felled the fearsome fellow out of something that the Army which ridiculed him did not have: faith in Adonai.

I have considered of late what would have happened if David and Goliath met today, I mean, the way the world is. I suspect it would go something like this:

David: "I am not afraid. I trust in Adonai the Lord of Heaven. I will slay the Anakim in Elah."

King Saul: "Well, you know many have tried, but invariably it turns the press against us. And you know the Zionists, how they are."

David: "You're not a Zionist?"

King Saul: "Quiet knave.". "You are only a child, you have no idea of the complexities of fighting the Anakim. And Goliath, he and his brothers have connections. The Anglo-Saxons are threatening to boycott our Royal College , and in the Dominion of Last Bastion, they are circulating petitions saying that WE are brutal. Now, if I send a young teenager out in the field, what shall the world think?

David: How care we what the world thinks, if we are just and in Adonai's will? I will slay the monster.

Saul: Even the Canadians ....

David: With my slingshot I will fell the Giant Goliath.

Saul: But he is catapulting missiles from schools, orphanages and churches. They know if we fire back or send in our men, they will make us look bad worldwide, and soon, no one will even do business with us. Yet if we let it stand, Siderot will not even exist in a month or more. I believe in conventional weapons: we will flush out the Anakim. There are a few Philistines who do not want them there either, for they seek to throw out even their new King and his court.

David: Yet, sire I can fell the Giant Goliath with faith and a small river stone. I have chosen five, yet in the will of God, I should only need one.

King Saul: "It is clear you have mental problems". "Nobody believes that stuff anymore".

David: "You're the one throwing his javelin around the courtyard like it was no big deal".

King Saul: "The King has his prerogative, and I will not be jousted with." "Do you realize the Giant Goliath has six toes on each foot and six fingers on each hand and so do his relations? Do you understand there are Anakim surrounding this nation, and that we are outnumbered 4 to 1? You don't even know what they do to boys like you." "At least take this armor---maybe he'll choke when he swallows it".

David: I need not armor, for I trust in the Lord God, Jehovah Sabaoth. And beside, your Highness of Israel, it was only today I found photos of their devious measures on youtube. "

Saul: I have some intelligence that says they mean , the Anakim, that is, to take the whole government in Gaza over and put Goliath at the head, and then aim for Judah. They are toppling even the lukewarm Philistines most duly elected, and planting explosives in Israeli fields and roads. Further, the great and newly coronated NdogoButi is coming from Bastion to see how things are going and
after King Ruhr, well, we can't be exactly sure whose side anyone is on anymore. You know, David, if you can take Goliath out fast, then well, we might just be in like Flint, but if you miss, it could start a world war."

David: One stone. One smooth stone. I promise.

The Courtier from the World Council of Kirche: King Saul, and David, whoever you are, wherever you are, I am from the WCK, the United front of all who pronounce God "GAWD", and of the contingent of the nonrepentant Kirks of yesteryear who have garnered much power throughout all Kingdoms everywhere, in which there is no consensus, not one about any issue, and are we not proud of that great ecumenical accomplishment and do we not command your respect, knowing how many Kirks adhere to our pro-Philistine policies, having seen the maiming by your Hebrew police of the small innocent 6 toed children of the Anakim race, and are we not heard and echoed on the great campuses of Universities worldwide regarding our pro-philistine policies, having duly noted the brutality of David who killed wantonly a young lion, in a day when lions are to be treated with respect and wonder, and understood for how can they know it is but a cultural thing for lions to break and chew Israeli children, and shouldn't Hebrew children of the first order have patience and realize that the lion truly only wanted to befriend him and here we have a dead and maimed lion at the hands of the beast, David. We shall boycott the Hebrews over the death of the Lion, and David's criminal assault on the Giant Goliath.

David: You would boycott Israel for killing a Lion that was maiming and eating the sheep, and for trying to take out a Giant who is hurling missiles at us day in and day out and trying to either take us over or take us out?

The Courtier of WCK: Well-l-l actually we were thinking embargoes, or buying our pens and caps elsewhere. You know, investing money from the Kirk in businesses outside Elah.

The Courtier then shows photos of blood covered children, the victims of war in Philistine hospitals to show how brutal King Saul's armies are.

David: But isn't it true that there are equal photos on the side of Judah, in Judaen hospitals of little 5 fingered children covered with blood from the attacks of the Philistines? And though it is a great sorrow for the whole world to see what war does to children of all ages, is it to be only Hebrew children who suffer? For I know these photos of the philistines are circulated widely across University campuses.

Courtier of the WCK: Well, you know, the Hebrew children having suffered for thousands of years, the world verily is used to it.

David: Well would it not be better if there be better if children on both sides were not maimed and that war did not happen and that missiles were left to decay---and what if that could be accomplished by the felling of one Anakim, the demon Goliath? For not all Philistines wish war, yet there be some with five fingers and toes also who would like to raise five toed children also who could peacefully coexist.

King Saul: Do you not know young knave the complexities of an ancient warfare and how the Philistines of the kind at Elah have no thought at all for peace? Courtier of the WCK, have ye no knowledge that they teach their children even the tiny ones to sing songs such as "Ring around the infidels, pocket full of shells, ashes , ashes they all fall down"? And that there is now an international move to a new national Anthem for Anakim called "Throw the Jew down the Well"?

Courtier of the WCK: We see it as cultural frustration.

Ambassador of the Wholly C: Why we must piusly add that this is a people the Anakim, who are feeling disenfranchised from their homeland, by intruders.

David: Tell me about it.
to be continued.....